Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Portia De Rossi Quotes

1. I was very sexual from a very young age.

2. I really liked the effect it would have on macho Australian men when they'd hit on me at a bar. I'd turn around and say I was in law school, and they'd shrivel up and go away.


3. Restriction generates yearning. You want what you cannot have.


4. I think it's important to see gay men and women having big careers and very full, rich lives.

5. Everyone is their own kind of lesbian. To think there's a certain way to dress or present yourself in the world is just one more stereotype we have to fit into.


6. I used to play husbands and wives with all my best friends and see how far they'd take it with me - I'd always be the one to come home from work and my wife would have a martini for me.


7. When it's quiet in my head like this, that's when the voice doesn't need to tell me how pathetic I am. I know it in the deepest part of me. When it's quiet like this, that's when I truly hate myself.


8. I want the roles that are interesting and quirky like Lindsay Bluth. I like shows that are smart like that.





9. I've had so many interviews where the last question is: "Are you gay?" I had to find very creative ways to say that I was gay, but that I wasn't going to talk about it.


10. She'd tell me how she'd handle the backhanded compliment by smiling and pretending she was receiving a genuine compliment all the while ignoring their attempt to be insulting. After all, it's the way an insult is received that makes it an insult. You can't really give offense unless someone takes it.

11. It's all about modeling, fashion, instead of acting. We need to get it back to acting and the actors, and not be so caught up in the fashion and model aspects.

12. I wouldn't even drive down Santa Monica Boulevard in fear that someone would look in the car window and think I was gay.


13. My feelings for Ellen overrode all of my fear about being out as a lesbian. I had to be with her, and I just figured I'd deal with the other stuff later.




14. I'm crying already, my God. Four minutes in, and I'm already crying.


15. "Normal" isn't an adjective you wish to hear after putting that much effort into making sure it was spectacular.

16. If I was 14 and knew some gay people, I wouldn't nearly have had the struggle I had. Our world is definitely changing.


17. I wondered if that's what aging felt like. That desire and reality were dueling until the day you die, that nobody every got to a place of peace. I had always wanted to get old so I didn't have to care anymore, but I began to think that it would be best just to skip the getting older part and just die.




18. It's hard living a life that's somewhat public, and hard when you put that life together with someone who is so famous and so loved and admired. It's also real exciting.


19. I love being able to wear dresses and clothes that make me feel feminine and beautiful, and I love the fact that I don't have to all the time; I can wear a tank and jeans.

20. I didn't understand that playing roles in any relationship is false and will inevitably lead to the relationship's collapse. No one can be any one thing all the time.

21. It sounds so trite, but my private life is mine.

22. It's not a passion of mine to become political in any way.


23. I finally understood that by being on a perpetual diet, I had practiced a "disordered" form of eating my whole life. I restricted when I was hungry and in need of nutrition and binged when I was so grotesquely full I couldn't be comfortable in any position by lying down. Diets that tell people what to eat or when to eat are the practices in between. And dieting, I discovered, was another form of disordered eating, just as anorexia and bulimia similarly disrupt the natural order of eating.

24. People can really relate to these characters, and that's what I think truly makes the show groundbreaking.





25. I'm living by example by continuing on with my career and having a full, rich life, and I am incidentally gay.

26. She was so courageous and so loud in '97, and now she is doing something that is more subliminal. She's changing the world, she really is, and it's exciting to be a part of that.


27. I began to see myself as someone who can help others understand diversity rather than feeling like a social outcast. Ellen taught me to not care about other people's opinions. She taught me to be truthful. She taught me to be free. I began to live my life in love and complete acceptance. For the first time I had truly accepted myself.



28. People might find me attractive, but it's also my job to prove that I can be intelligent.


29. Thanks so much, everybody, for making gay marriage legal, thank you for everything you've done - I'm just going to walk through that door.


30. My decision not to eat animals anymore was paramount to my growth as a spiritual person. It made me aware of greed and made me more sensitive to cruelty. It made me feel like I was contributing to making the world better and that I was connected to everything around me. I felt like I was part of the whole by respecting every living thing rather than using it and destroying it by living unconsciously. Healing comes from love. And loving every living thing in turn helps you love yourself.

31. The talk show isn't on in Australia, but my grand remembered Ellen's sitcom and just remembered her as a gay personality. First thing she said was: "Well, this is a very bad day".



32. In high school I had sex with girls quite a few times. They were straight women who I convinced to jump in the sack with me.


33. I could tell by his expression that once he got over his anger at me for keeping this secret from him, there was nothing left to talk about. He wasn't confused. He didn't need questions answered. He didn't ask why or how or with whom or whether I thought maybe it might just be a phase. He didn't ask who knew and who didn't know or whether I thought it might ruin my career. I was his sister and he didn't care whether I was straight or gay; it simply didn't matter to him.

34. There's a lot I won't do. I don't feel comfortable with sex scenes, and I don't like being the girl. I don't like playing the sidekick to an action hero.


35. Women in the postfeminist era, while supposedly strong and commanding and equal to men in every sense, looked weaker and smaller than ever before.



36. I thought that if I accomplished enough, that somehow I would be let off the hook in the future. Like I didn't have to keep striving and achieving because I had done that already, and it would add up to being enough.


37. We just were kind of supposed to be together. That's my side of the story. I really, really hated all the pain I put Francesca through, but I just couldn't ignore the feelings I had for Ellen.


38. Just look at all the awards shows now. It has turned into a catwalk. You have to be wearing a certain designer, a certain dress, and everyone's critiquing.

39. When I left Australia, my grand said: "I'd really like to meet her".


40. I can't explain the birds to you even if I tried. In the early morning, when the sun's rays peek over the mountain and subtly light up the landscape in a glow that, if audible, would sound like a hum, the birds sing. They sing in a layered symphony, hundreds deep. You really can't believe how beautiful it is. You hear bass notes from across the farm and soprano notes from the tree in front of you all at once, at varying volumes, like a massive choir that stretches across fifty acres of land. I love birds. But not as much as my wife loves them. My wife thinks about them, whereas I only notice them once they call for attention. But she looks for them, builds fountains for them, and saves them after they crash into windows. I've seen her save many birds. She holds them gently in the palm of her hand, and she takes them to one of the fountains she's built especially for them and holds their beaks up to the gentle trickle of water to let them drink, to wake them up from their dazed stupor. No matter how much time it takes, she doesn't leave them until they recover. And they mostly always do.

41. When I was about 16, I was crazy about this girl. I had a certain amount of money in the bank where I could put a downpayment on a rental, and I went to her with sunflowers.



42. I was trying to find a reason for having had to escape from the place that was my home. To convince myself of my choices, I had to make it a place that everyone should want to escape from.


43. When you live in Australia, Europe is so far away and so fascinating, so stylish and cultured and sophisticated.

44. "Ally McBeal" was four whole years of making sure I didn't shift my weight onto my left leg and put my hand on my hip.

45. I try to be feminine, yet intellectual and smart at the same time. You don't see enough of that.

46. Ellen's a great actress, a very, very versatile actress.


47. By starving myself into society's beauty ideal, I had compromised my success, my independence, and my quality of life. Being overweight was really no different. It was just the "f- you" response to the same pressure. I was still responding to the pressure to comply to the fashion industry's standards of beauty, just in the negative sense. I was still answering to their demands when really I shouldn't have been listening to them at all. The images of stick-thin prepubescent girls never should have had power over me. I should've had my sights set on successful businesswomen and successful female artists, authors, and politicians to emulate. Instead I stupidly and pointlessly just wanted to be considered pretty. I squandered my brain and my talent to squeeze into a size 2 dress while my male counterparts went to work on making money, making policy, making a difference.

48. Francesca and I have very different backgrounds and interests, and there's a lot we had to kind of make work. But we had great respect and love for each other.

49. Supermodels are over, and the new picture girl has become the television actress.

50. I actually was offered the role of the makeup artist in "Gia". That was really early in my career, and I just couldn't imagine playing gay.


51. The theory of objectivism claims that there are certain things that most people in society can agree upon. A model is pretty. A lawyer is smart. Our society is based upon objectivism. It's how we make rules and why we obey them.

52. I came out to my mom three times. First at 16, when she found "The Joy of Lesbian Sex" under my bed. She was devastated.

53. The diet industry is making a lot of money selling us fad diets, nonfat foods full of chemicals, gym memberships, and pills while we lose a piece of our self-esteem every time we fail another diet or neglect to use the gym membership we could barely afford.


54. I want to exude strength and intelligence.

55. I didn't really know what it was like to be a celebrity, and the only people I knew who had a similar experience were these women whom I worked with.

56. And dieting, I discovered, was another form of disordered eating, just as anorexia and bulimia similarly disrupt the natural order of eating. "Ordered" eating is the practice of eating when you are hungry and ceasing to eat when your brain sends the signal that your stomach is full…All people who live their lives on a diet are suffering. If you can accept your natural body weight and not force it to beneath your body's natural, healthy weight, then you can live your life free of dieting, of restriction, of feeling guilty every time you eat a slice of your kid's birthday cake.


57. I don't want to kiss somebody I don't want to kiss. It's just not worth it to me to feel compromised in that way.




58. We must be able to inspire. That's my goal in acting.

59. I want young people to see me and think you can be feminine and smart and successful, all at the same time.


60. I had a great relationship with Francesca. But I just kind of knew, deep down in my heart, that there was the possibility of something more. I think we really weren't suited for each other for a long period of time.

61. When I was 15, I changed my name legally. I think it was largely due to my struggle about being gay. Everything just didn't fit, and I was trying to find things I could identify myself with, and it started with my name.


62. If you've looked at all the glamour magazines lately, all the covers are actresses. If they are on those covers, they are going to try to emulate models. That's just the way it is.


63. I love playing all different kinds of women, and the majority of women aren't gay, so the majority of characters aren't going to be gay.


64. When I watched Ellen come out in '97, my jaw was on the floor. I thought: "There are some people who break the doors down, hold them open, and some people who walk right through".





65. My sexuality is a part of me that I really like. But it's not the totality of me.

66. When you have the paparazzi hiding in the bushes outside your home, the only thing you can control is how you respond publicly.


67. I really feel not alone for the first time in my life.



68. The most important thing for me was to never, ever, ever deny it. But I didn't really have the courage to talk about it. I was thinking: "The people who need to know I'm gay know".

69. You live with the fear people might find out. Then you actually have the courage to tell people and they go: "I don't think you are gay". It's enough to drive you crazy.


70. When I was anorexic it just seemed like I literally wanted to disappear. And now I would like to reappear.

71. True nobility isn't about being better than anyone else; it's about being better than you used to be.

72. I did a lot of fast talking as a youth; I was pretty good at it. I was never talked into it - I was always the one doing the talking.


73. Shame weighs a lot more than flesh and bone.






74. I didn't choose the fact that I was gay, but I did choose whether to live my life as a gay woman - that was the terrifying thing for me. Especially being a gay actress.

75. Life can take so many twists and turns. You can't ever count yourself out. Even if you're really afraid at some point, you can't think that there's no room for you to grow and do something good with your life.


76. I had a hell of a time convincing people I was gay - which was so annoying!




77. Recovery feels like shit. It didn't feel like I was doing something good; it felt like I was giving up. It feels like having to learn how to walk all over again.


78. I don't even like watching sex scenes in movies. I have a slight prudish side to me.





79. Average. It was the worst, most disgusting word in the English language. Nothing meaningful or worthwhile ever came from that word.

80. I have to be asked, I guess, but I love the idea of marriage. I think it's beautiful. I'm such a romantic, and I always have been.


81. And I somehow always felt less lonely when I was completely alone.



82. I justified it in so many ways. I had a very, very long and difficult struggle with my sexuality.

83. You don't have to be emaciated or vomiting to be suffering. All people who live their lives on a diet are suffering.


84. I knew that I was gay, I knew it. I just couldn't see myself as a gay woman, even though that's where my heart was.


85. There's a fine line between being private and being ashamed.



86. I ran into Ellen at a photo shoot. She took my breath away. That had never happened to me in my life.

87. I married him for a green card. We had a really great, caring relationship; it just obviously wasn't right for me.


88. I don't know where this pressure came from. I can't blame my parents because it has always felt internal. Like any other parent, my mother celebrated the A grades and the less-than-A grades she felt there was no need to tell anybody about. But not acknowledging the effort that ended in a less than perfect result impacted me as a child. If I didn't win, then we wouldn't tell anyone that I had even competed to save us the embarrassment of acknowledging that someone else was better. Keeping the secret made me think that losing was something to be ashamed of, and that unless I was sure I was going to be the champion there was no point in trying. And there was certainly no point to just having fun.

89. I really never stopped thinking about Ellen, because I just haven't felt that kind of energy with anyone in my life.

90. Even when I took first prize, topped the class, won the race, I never really won anything. I was merely avoiding the embarrassment of losing.


91. I stumbled into acting and just loved it. I deferred law school - and I'm still deferred.



92. I had to find a relationship with someone who could simultaneously make me grow up and keep me forever young.

93. I saw Ellen and my knees were weak. It was amazing. And it was very hard for me to get her out of my mind after that. Then when I saw her that night, we started talking, and that's that.


94. I highly recommend inviting the worst-case scenario into your life.









95. I thought, I'm out in my life, that doesn't involve my public life.

96. In other words, accept yourself. Love your body the way it is and feel grateful towards it. Most importantly, in order to find real happiness, you must learn to love yourself for the totality of who you are and not just what you look like.


 
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